delivering the delivery

atas permintaan dan desakan dr leha and nad yang dah nak deliver tak lama lagik, so aku luangkan masa aku yg terlampau bz ni utk buat jugak post nie...nie time luch, aku sanggup postpone lunch sbb nak buat post nie..inipun aku menaip sblh tgn sbb sblh lg mengepam...padahal kejer aku betimbun nie...tp xsiap gak post nie...sambung esonye, xsiap gak...pehtuh on Sunday nak jugak buat, xsempat gak siap...and finally, today on Monday, after almost 4 mths after delivery, aku berjaya siapkan smp aku xkuar gi lunch le....

nie ialah sambungan dr post aku yg bertajuk SHOW....

reader's discretion is advisable...please be inform that this post is my personal experience and view....each mother has different experience in their labour...dun be afraid of wut i'm sharing....especially to mother-to-be....leha, ellia, nad, sai and future mother-to-be....but some bits & pieces i've forgotten...almaklumlah, pas besalin nie, aku slalu sgt lupe...bnyk urat putus...huhu....

on 27th dec 2010 (tuesday), i went to pusrawi and was referred to HSB since i've "show"....and on 28th, when i woke up at around 11:am (almaklum la aku kan dah MC, pz plak dah cuti smp hujung thn), the "show" is still coming...i'm not sure wut to do, so i call K Linda since HSB advised me to come on Thursday which is lusa...dia ckp, pegi jerk sepital tuh...sbb dah turun darah..kalo HSB xnak entertain, pegi jerk Pusrawi & induce...K Linda and abang nie dr aku star overdue lg derang dah sebok soh aku induce..derang ni dah mcm spoke person product induce ni jerk...aku rs derang ni dpt commission kot every time org induce...huhuhuhu....sebenanyer aku tau sbb ape derang dok sebok soh aku induce..sbbnyer derang skang ade kat kl, and derang plan nak balik ipoh since last 2 days but they extend their stay sbb nak tggu aku deliver...tuh yg xabes2 soh induce...

then aku cam xle nak terima suggestion to induce from K Linda, so aku call Dr Zul from Pusrawi...aku tanya dia mmg kompom ke kene operate?? dia ckp dia pun xsure, kene tgk keadaan...bincang2 dgn pz, pz kt "jom la kita gi sepital..." so kitowang pun siap...tp sempat le mkn pancake with crispy chicken bacon made by pz...lps je aku siap2 tuh, tetibe aku rasa blkg aku mcm sakit jerk...lenguh yg mcm time period tp sakit lagik...memula aku xkesah...then it came again, and again...and again...i tot to maself, is it contraction?? aku time, and it happened every 15mins....then ms dlm keta nak gi sepital pun sakit gak...

sampai sepital at around 1, ckp kat nurse front desk tuh, aku dah contraction...then dok le gak kat kerusi menunggu tuh....so, dia panggil tuk buat CTG...xabes-abes CTG dr smlm...this time lama ckit dia buat...dia ckp bb bam-bam tido...ok, so dah buat CTG blk kat tpt menunggu balik...tggu lama gak le, pastuh cam bese, kene cek opening lagik....still 3cm...after that kene buat CTG lagik sbb td masa buat CTG earlier, bb bam-bam was sleeping...so da CTG wasn't very cantek bak kata nurse...pastuh balik ke tpt menunggu lagik...this time lama giler aku tunggu, smp kol 6:00 after almost more than an hr waiting, aku tanya nurse, ape citer nie...sbb other patient dah pegi labour room and had their dinner...tetibe derang baru plak nak tgk file aku....hak elah....bole plak terlepas kan file aku....then dlm kol 7 tuh, baru derang buat keputusan nak soh aku balik plak....tetibe masa aku nak jalan amek file tuh, contraction giler kuat...and da gap was 5 mins apart...

aku ckp kat nurse contraction dah kerap nie...then dia ckp, tp awak punyer opening br 3cm...aku ckp sakit dah nie, then nurse tuh ckp "xpe, awak balik dolu, nnt kalo sakit nak besalin, awak dtg balik.." aku jawap, "tp nie dah sakit sgt nie...nak jalan pun xle dah"....then dia soh aku baring kat katil...dia panggil ade sorang nurse nie...nurse nie aku tgk dia cam rajin ckit le compare to others...pastuh dia ckp, "baru bukak 3cm erk?? xpe, sy tolong buat jadik 4cm..." dia ckp tuh ngan muka selumber...pehtuh dia rodok tgn dia dlm vagina aku pehtuh dia pusing2 tgn dia...humang aih sakit weis....sbb syarat tuk admit for delivery kene at least opening 4cm...sambil tuh dia tanya, "minum air selusuh ker??" aku jawap le ha'ah...pastuh dia ckp "owh...minum air selusuh...patut la..." then dia pandang nurse lain ckp "dia nie minum air selusuh" sambil buat2 muka....aku tanya, "kenapa?" dia ckp "kalo minum air selusuh nie mmg sakit lebih sikit, sbb dia bagi kita cepat sakit nak beranak"

dah sudah tuh, ade nurse bagi aku baju kaler hijau soh tuka......tgh aku dok lepak jerk menunggu, ade doc specialist buat round to wrap up da day...then aku tanya doc tuh, "doc, mmg sy akan besalin operate ker??" then doc jawap " xtau, kita tgk keadaan, kalo Allah bukak jalan, InsyaAllah bole bersalin normal"...then mr hubby dtg nak hanta nasi goreng yg dia beli...tp xle masuk, aku plak xle nak kuar sbb xlarat kot nak bejalan, so nurse amek kan...huhuhuh...

aku mintak kat nurse, bole tak bg ubat tahan sakit...dia ckp, nnt kita gi labour ward br bagik...then, dtg nurse lain, bawak wheelchair, dia nak bwk aku gi labour ward....sampai labour ward tuh, masa aku nak bgn dr wheelchair to da bed, tetibe contraction attack...then nurse tuh cakap, "naik le atas katil.." aku jawap "kejap ye..sy tgh sakit"...then dia bole plak tggu jerk kat tepi meja sambil tgk aku menahan sakit and struggling to get up of da wheelchair to da bed...serious dia buat tak tau je kot...ok, aku tau le ko dah tgk org sakit nak beranak every single minute, and i didn't pay to get special treatment, tp xkan le ko tak berhati perut kot....aku rs dlm job scope dia ade statement "you are forbidden to help patient during their contraction."... so, ini le consequences besaling kat GH...

aku mkn ckit jerk nasi tuh, pastuh mmg dah xle blah...sbb sakit kot contraction..camne nak mkn sambil tahan contraction kan?? tgh aku tunggu dlm labbour room tuh, aku nampak le nurse berlari-lari sbb ade org nak labour... pastuh suami2 org pun berlari-lari....huhuhu...makin nervous aku...then nurse tuh dtg balik, dia tanya dah mkn ker?? aku kt dah..."baring, kita buat CTG" nurse tuh ckp...buat lagik CTG, time tuh dah kol 10:00 mlm dah...aku mintak lg ubat tahan sakit tuh, dia jawap "xle sbb anak awak tido...takut kalo mkn ubat tuh, anak awak lg tido..." then, masuk doc muda, cek CTG aku....dia kuar...dtg plak doc lain, yg senior ckit, tgk CTG aku...bergilir-gilir plak doc yg tgk CTG aku nie...after almost 2 hoours, derang buat decision bawak aku gi labour room...aku dengar dia ckp camtuh "huh??!!! labour room??!!"

da thing bout delivery in GH nie, wut ever they do, they didn't inform or discuss with you...so, masa kat dlm labour room tuh, tetibe aku rs cam nak berak..aku ckp kat nurse, dia jawap "xpe..awak baring jerk..kalo terberak, kita akan cuci"....aku pun baring jele...then derang pasang balik mesin CTG tuh...dtg sorang nurse nie, dia cucuk something kat lengan kanan aku, then dia dtg bwk drip...aku tanya le tuk ape, dia kt tuk bg aku senang besalin....rupenyer induce..nak kecutkan rahim sbb nak force delivery...masuk jerk drip tuh, MasyaAllah.... Subhanallah...Nauzubillah...Lailahaillallah....dia punyer sakit, Allah jerk yg tau...time nie contraction non-stop....air mata aku jgn ckp le dah bape bnyk kuar...air kencing pun toksah kire le...sampai tiga kali aku terkencing sbb sakit sgt....semua surah aku dah baca, 4Qul, Al-Fatihah, Ayat Kursi, Ayat yg nabi Yusof baca pun dah...aku rasa cam dah nak katam jerk....selawat, mengucap, zikir, semua dah....then dtg doc yg senior tuh...aku cakap kat dia "xpe le doc, operate jele".....then doc tuh bole jawap dgn nada yg sgt strict "mana bole operate..u ingat senang ke nak operate??? if something happened, kalau i terpotong bladder u, u nak pakai beg sepanjang hayat??? it's not easy tau...no..no...no..." eh emo plak doc nie...aku yg sakit ke ko yg sakit...aku malas nak argue sbb time nie aku mmg tgh tahan sakit...aku yg sebelum nie pikir aku bole tahan sakit, tp...sakit nie mmg unbearable... mmg la org kata sakit nak beranak tuh sakit kedua paling sakit slepas mati....but u will never can imagine it until u've experience it....

and da most painful was, aku menanggung sakit nie sorang sbb pz xle masuk...then i heard one of the nurse said to da doc, "dia nie minum air selusuh nie doc"....then ade plak nurse and doc yg menyahut, "owh..yeke.." aku dlm hati "wut da fuck...pasal yg korang anti sgt ngan air selusuh nie?? air selusuh nie kan ayat2 suci jerk"...then ade sorang doc cine laki "wut is air selusuh??"...sebok le nurse2 tuh nak explain....then nurse2 semua dah kuar...tggl le doc laki cine nie td...aku masih lagik menahan sakit nie....tgh aku dok mengerang-ngerang tahan sakit nie....doc cine laki tuh bole plak bantai tido kat meja tuh hujung katil aku nie...mcm lena plak tuh...tau le dah kol 1:00am lebih...tp aku kan tgh sakit, jgn le ko tido...nampak cam ko tuh insensitive... from time to time around every 15 mins, da doc will come to see my CTG result...and bb bam-bam still sleeping...aku dah ngiring ke kanan, ke kiri, telentang still tido gak...dah goncang-goncang perut aku pun dia tido gak lg..then dtg sorang doc tomboy nie, dia panggil nurse soh selak selimut aku...mmg dah basah lencun le time tuh sbb aku dah terkencing bnyk kali kan, and aku pun tak sure sebenanyer aku terkencing or air ketuban yg dah pecah...masa nurse selak tuh, dia bole cover her nose maybe sbb hancing le kot kan...but, do u really have to do that??be professional la...dun u think it might offen me??...agaknya sbb aku dah mengerang sgt and derang tgk aku cam sakit giler, doc tuh bg le aku oxygen mask tuk redakan sakit...dpt jerk kat aku, aku breath laju giler...yele, bile ko tahan sakit ko akan bernafas laju...bukan bole control pun...then doc tuh ckp "jgn nafas laju-laju...nafas slowly..breath in, breath out"....aku cam lega ckit le pas napas gune oxygen tuh...tp aku cam pening ckit le kot sbb dah mcm terover dose....then derang cek opening and it's just 6cm jerk...

tetibe jerk pastuh terus kelam kabut ko...tetibe aku dengar riuh2 suara doc and nurse...and pz pun dah masuk time tuh...aku nampak pz pandang aku ngan muka yg sedih and amat sayu....dia dtg kat aku, dia usap pala aku, dia soh aku mengucap, beristighfar....then doc tuh explain yg aku kene masuk operation theatre and they ask pz to sign something....tetibe ramai giler nurse kerumun kat aku...dengan sorang tuh nak tanggalkan induce, sorang lg nak masuk tiub air kencing, sorang nak cukur, 2 org lagik nak tuka kan baju aku....tetibe dtg lg sorang nak soh aku sign time aku tgh2 sakit tuh....then pz menyampuk, "kalo saya sign on behalf xle ke??" sbb sah-sah le aku tgh terseksa menahan sakit....nurse tuh jawap "xle...kene pesakit jugak..xpe puan, puan tanda right aje pun cukup la"....bole pla camtuh kan?? dah le aku mmg xle kot nak baca...inikan nak sign...aku pun sign jele dgn tgn yg mengigil-gigil tuh....

siap jerk nurse-nurse tuh kerjakan aku, derang bukak induce tuh, baru le aku dpt melihat dunia nie dgn jelas....then derang terus sorong aku bawak pegi operation theater....time nie aku dah bole berfikir ckit le...mmg lega le pas dah tanggal induce...and sakit contraction tuh xrasa sgt sakit pun...and bole le nak bercakap ngan nurse2 yg tolak aku tuh....dia punyer OT plak jauh giler kau....dlm 20 mins baru sampai...smp 3 lift le aku kuar masuk....and bile smp OT, ade plak doc anesthetic nie buat explanation...soh aku sign memacam lagik le...time nie, aku dah bole le sign cantik2...cukup le penjuru signature aku tuh...and aku dah bole bgn duduk utk pindah dr katil sorong ke katil OT.....

giler sejuk dowh dlm OT....menggigil aku dgn pakai baju nipis tuh...yele, kol 3:00 am and kat luar plak hujan ok...perut plak terdedah kan...then doc anesthetic tu soh aku dok, jgn bongkok and in good posture sbb dia nak cucuk epidural...

then aku baring...time nie aku mmg dah numb waist and below....tp i can still control my movement...it's just numb jerk...and for the last time, doc cek opening and tanpa rasa sakit, aku kangkang jerk ngan selumber and punggung aku tak terangkat pun...aku rasa dia masuk tgn tp serious tak sakit...and it's still 6cm....so derang pun proceed tuk operate...they cover dgn kain at my waist area buat mcm langsir supaya aku xnampak le derang buat ape kan...tp, sah-sah le lampu spotlight kat atas pale aku tuh bole reflect wut ever da doc is doing....

aku rasa le something lalu straight jerk kat perut aku exactly atas rahim....time nie dia tgh belah perut aku...and aku rasa cam ade org korek-korek perut aku...and aku ade rasa cam a bit struggle masa derang nak kuarkan bb bam-bam...and from da reflection of da spotlight, aku nampak dia tgh tarik bb bam-bam kuar...aku nampak bontot dia dah kuar...and i think his head was stuck sbb aku nampak derang cam tarik-tarik ke kiri, ke kanan...aku risau cam terkepak plak pale anak aku tuh...huhuhu....yelah sbb pale bb dah engage, so derang nak kuarkan dr pelvic area tuh...aku nampak cam ade satu spot hitam giler kat bontot dia..i tot, nie birthmark dia nie....bile dia dah kuar tuh, aku xdenga pun bunyik bb nangis...none at all...just a conversation among docs and nurses....aku terpikir "Ya Allah, janganlah anak aku bisu"..then aku dengar bunyik air pasang dr paip kat sink...and at that moment, that very moment, i heard da miracle of Allah....keajaiban Allah...Allahuakbar...aku dengar suara bb menangis...and it was da most wonderful sounds i've heard....Alhamdulillah....

then nurse bawak bb kat aku, first thing dia tunjuk kat aku, tote budak tuh...aku wut da fuk?? dia selak kain bedung tuh, dia tunjuk tote bb then dia tanya "betul ini anak puan?" aku macam kompius...mn le aku tau rupe tote anak aku...huhu...aku jawap le "ha'ah" then dia tunjuk muka, putih giler, bulat giler and i was overwhelming at this moment and menitis le air mata aku...that was da 1st moment i sees him...da bun that was in my oven for 9 months...it's now ready...then dia soh aku cium, and she then took him away....

rupenyer dia bawak bb pegi nursery...a few minute b4 that derang dah call pz soh dtg nursery.."encik, suami puan amiriah? sila dtg nursery ye..utk azankan anak"....pz ckp time tuh dia dlm surau...baru pas solat hajat...dia sampai and he saw a lil bb..da only bb in that nursery, muka bulat and merah, mata sepet yang dok terkebil-kebil...muka sgt sembap...nurse tuh ckp "kiblat arah sana ye..tau ke mcm mana nak pegang?"..pz jawap "tau kot..sy akan cube"....then da nurse left...tggl le pz ngan bb tuh bedua dlm nursery...bile pz angkat jerk, and azan kat telinga dia, pz ckp suasana tenang jerk...bb tuh tgk jerk muka pz sambil paying full attention...no sound at all coming from da bb...lepas tuh, pz letak and spent a few moment wif his son...bb bam-bam diam jerk...tak nangis, xde ek..xde uk...and sbb xde sape pun dlm tuh, no doc, no nurse and not even a guard, so dia snap le pic that bb....our bb...


yang aku plak masih lagik dlm OT....doc tgh sebok menjahit...lama giler dowh...dkt nak sejam le...menjahit saje...yele, 7 lapis jahitan kan...aku rasa le dia dok goncang2 perut aku...tarik-tarik kiri and kanan...nak jerk aku ckp "doc, alang-alang dah bukak tuh, selain sedut darah, ape kata sedut lemak saya skalik"...huhu...tp aku ckp dlm hati jele...since aku pun dah buhsan, terbaring jerk...aku pun tanya le,

aku : nurse bape berat anak saya?
nurse : 3.8kg
aku : berat jugak ye...berapa panjang dia?
nurse : huh?? ape dia?
aku : berapa panjang dia??
nurse : (gelak)
aku : pahal plak nurse nie?? salah ke aku tanya?? salah ke soklan aku nie?? (dlm hati jele)
doc : dia tanya ape nurse?
nurse : dia tanya panjang anak dia
(then doc and nurse tuh gelak sesama)
nurse : mn le kita tau panjang dia...mn ade org ukur panjang nie...
aku : ade je kot...ko kot yg xtau...(dlm hati gak le)
so aku yg being polite nie pun tersengih-sengih sumbang and ckp, "owh, yeke??"

setelah almost 2 hrs dlm OT, derang pun bwk aku kuar...and nak pindahkan aku dr katil OT ke katil sorong...aku tanya "larat ke nak angkat saya??" nurse tuh jawap "larat je..bole"...aku plak jawap balik, "kalo tak larat takpe..sy bole bgn.." "awak bole ke gerakkan kaki?" tanya nurse tuh pulak...aku try angkat, skalik tak bergerak da....so derang pun angkat...sorong le aku gi ward...xde le plak jauh wardnyer...sampai jerk, tgk pz dah ade dgn beg2 aku....muka dia cam hepi jerk and aku pun hepi jerk jumpe dia...ward nie 3rd class...ade 6 katil and it's open...just ade langsir2 jerk...katil aku depan meja nurse2 nie...huhuhu...aku soh pz mtk kat nurse nak mskkan aku kat 2nd class ward..nurse ckp, sape yg br c-sec mmg kene dok cni..dpn nurse..senang dia nak observe...sok, dah ok baru bole tuka..itupun kalo ade kosong..aku cek brg2 cukup ke...then aku soh pz amek brg lg....mcm nak sembang ngan pz, tp time tuh kol 4 and time org tgh tido...and bukan time melawat...so we kiss gud bye...bb dlm cot sblah aku...aku mtk nurse amekkan sbb aku nak tgk...aku mmg xle bgn...kene lying flat even without a pillow for 12 hrs...xle mkn, xle minum....aku dah le kebulur kot...mlm td xsempat nak mkn, and ko pun dah kuarkan isi perut aku...mmg lapo le...then nurse tuh angkat bb bg aku tgk..tp memandangkan epidural tuh agak kuat, i didn't get a clear view sbb mamai...nurse suapkan aku air 2-3 teguk...terus aku tetido....

so itu le experience aku giving birth...experience post-natal in hospital akan di hapdate later...walaupun xtau bile...hahahaha...janji aku dah bayar hutang korang...so puas ati ke nad and leha?? and for sai & ellia, lambat lg le korang nak merasa nie..tp, be prepared...hahaha...giler susah kot nak buat post nie sampai 4 kali type pun tak siap2...smp nak 4 bln br siap...