Adat VS Agama

1) Choose the right partner:
men can choose women because of their wealth, position, beauty and agama,if utamakan the agama, thus u will profit from it' hadith bukhari and Muslim.
as for the women, if comes a guy with good iman and akhlak, then marry him' hadith tarmidzi, hadis hasan(baik) menurut al-Albaniy.

2) Akad nikah Venue
Paling afdal is in Masjid (but take note that women in mentruation(inclusive of bride and guests) are not allowed in the praying area, corridor/hall is allowed though). 'pukullah kompang' Hadis Hassan and Tarmidzi
but i asked mak and ustaz here in my office (yes, my colleagues are ustazs)...they said, nowdays we have technology (pad)...before, we were not allowed to sit in the praying area coz of the consequences of leaking...

3) No such thing as hantaran is WAJIB...
so yes if u dont hv enuff money ITS OK not to have hantaran. If ada rezeki by all means (but don't forget to be humble because we if niat to riya', riya' hukum is syirik. The only thing that is WAJIB in nikah is the MAHAR(mas kahwin) firman Allah SWT in surrah al nisaa ayat no 4.(refer to alquran). the amount of the mas kahwin is determined by both the future bride and grooms family. The less burden the guy gets from collecting the mahar, the more Allah s.w.t will berkat the marriage, (refer to hadith sahih Iman Ahmad) also (hadith muslim, al-hakim, & ibnu Majah :- 'sebaik-baik mas kahwin ialah mas kahwin yang paling mudah dan ringan'
that was my intention...not to have a hantaran at first...but after a few argument wif mak, we decided to letak da amount RM5k...but on da engagement day, tetibe ade plak org yg menyampuk RM8k...so...RM8k it will be...

4) Favours during nikah,
Rasullulah SAW galakkan us to give out manisan ex:dates(kurma) during the nikah..i gave cupcakes...ok la kan??

5) Isytiharkan ur nikah
kepada as many poeple as you can, so we dont create any fitnah....that's why i'm having a majlis bersanding....

6) Majlis walimah,
in Islam it says that 'adakanlah majlis walimah walaupun dengan seekor kambing' (hadith muslim) clearly here shows that even those who don't have that much money still can afford to get married. & yes, for those with more rezeki, having wedding in hotels, halls, is still allowed in Islam, as long as your niat is not to menunjuk-nunjuk, Para tetamu has both the rich and the poor.
'Rasulullah SAW says:- the worst of walimah is those who only invited the rich, and forgetting the poor' hadith bukhari and Muslim.
And hindarkan segala adat yang against Islam esp those came from other religion and culture example. 'Rasulullah SAW says sesiapa yang menyerupai adat suatu kaum, maka dia termasuk dalam kaum tersebut', (hadith Ahmad and Abu Daud)
that's why mak kata, no need for henna...macam hindu...

7) It's Sunnah for the guests to congratulate the newlywed...
so nnt i buat yg wishes sheet tuh, all da guest bole le write their comment..

8) Solat jemaah together
Pada malam pertama, (solat wajib and solat sunat) for Allah SWT will berkat the marriage when it starts the right way. Insyaallah....

9) Solat Hajat (tambahan)
lakukanlah solat hajat sebelum majlis untuk mendoakan semoga majlis tuh berjalan lancar, para hadirin, tetamu dan saudara mara berpuas hati, dan paling penting, diberkati Allah...kalo satu family buat lg bagus...afterall, it's a family reception..kenduri keluarga....

well, basically rasanyer my wed follows the Agama punyer requirement...Insyallah...
adat nie semua, most of the time...mak kita yg nak macam nie and macam tuh...sbb mak-mak kita dolu banyak gune adat...tp tegaknyer melayu adalah kerana adat...for me, as long as the adat tak melanggar agama...OK lah kot....